Two weeks after breaking my ankle and subsequent surgery I hobbled into Ellen’s healing room.

A month prior Ellen, on a healing quest to cure her breast cancer leaves Fort Lauderdale, travels to Esalen Institute in California to meet with Don Oscar. Fun fact, Don Oscar lives up the road in Palm Beach, Florida.

Hobbling into the room on crutches a beautiful altar is laid out on the floor… the air is buzzing. Teetering trying to keep my balance with the ankle still in a cast. “Look here” the shaman says, “right between my eyes, now don’t look away.”

Taking swigs from one of the bottles he spit-sprays the liquid elixir mist all over me as the scent of flowers fills the space within and around me.

Staring at me he says “You have trained with many people of power, now it’s time for you to carry your own medicine bag.”

The next session the power song starts flowing through me as gifts to clients during their soul retrieval sessions.

A decade after the “index card experience” my helping ally- one of the names on the index card- tells me it’s time to learn heart centered shamanic Depossession, so I travel to Wisconsin to be in the circle.

I’m also here to visit the Indian mounds. They’re calling me. After checking into my room, putting the suitcase on the bed I look out the window as the sun is setting…. The deep indigo blue-sky contrasts with the dusty rust-golden colored wheat field.

WHAM.
It’s the EXACT SAME LANDSCAPE SCENE as the painted index card.
Whoa. Que the Twilight Zone music.

Everyone’s buzzing with excitement as we exit the bus at the effigy mounds. I walk up the path with reverence, quietly singing and rattling… before I know it, I’m walking in two worlds…I’m also seeing water and hearing the words “What happened to the water?”

In the “LONG Before” I’m seeing the verdant green mounds are surrounded by water; there are hollowed-out boats arriving for the rituals and celebrations. There’s dancing, singing and drumming. So much joy. When it’s time to leave the mounds that day I give thanks for the visions, the spirits of the land and the gifts bestowed.

Later that evening the teacher asks the circle to set up an experiential representation of the mounds in the meeting room. Everyone takes their assigned place…

The room is pitch dark, there’s only candlelight on the altar.

My ally says, “why is no one singing?”

“You’re representing the 13th moon.”

I’m standing on the 13th mound. 13 mounds representing the 13 moons. As I rattle…. a song is rising… I question….

“NOW, really?”

“YES! SING”, she replies. Sing the song of the “LONG Before”…. into the future.

Throwing off my cloak of anonymity… I feel someone next to me; my eyes slightly open as the teacher puts her recording device at my feet.

After the session I’m buzzing with energy…expanded. Other people in the circle are now coming up touching me. It’s uncomfortable.

The next morning the teacher asks if I’m willing to set up the experiential mound in the meeting room again this evening using my recorded “LONG Before” power song.

“No, that’s not going to work for me.” Even though she’s disappointed I hold firm to the boundary.

“People are asking for the song. Can I release the song to the students who are here?”

“Can you teach me how to unhook from people psychically reaching in while listening to the power song?”

My question is met with silence. It’s a big NO.

Now fifteen years later I understand it’s all a dance; I’m learning the steps as a newbie medium, how to hold a clear yes and a clear no. My energetic body was not ready to hold that space for others, that will come with time.

Within a year I’m singing power songs and sending them out into my community at each new moon. Playing in the “Long Before.”

Yesterday I learned from a Facebook post that the effigy mounds thousands of years ago, in the “Long Before” were indeed surrounded by water.

In Aquarius you are called to be the pioneer… to gather up our stories… from the “there and then” and the “here and now”; these are seeds asking to be planted. The world needs the power of our songs.

I am the One who is an Interstellar Magi dancing in the “LONG Before.”

Celebrating Ellen’s legacy on her 74th birthday.

The post Part 2 Index Card first appeared on Michele Grace Design & Marketing.

and an unkindness to you.

Take that in a moment…or two.

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Years ago in a breathwork session I had a vision of sitting in church and knowing God within. Not because what the pastor told me, it came from my near-death experience as a child; my connection to nature and walking the shamanic path of direct experience. Everyone in the congregation during that vision also came from this place of god\goddess from within. It was an extraordinary heart opening experience.

This week a student I adore was judged for walking her own path of direct experience….in response this is what I shared:

In the mid-90’s essential oils were laughed at by the muggles. Today those that laughed or held disdain are pitching them all over social media. What is new will scare people and then it becomes the norm. Are you on the path of cutting edge stuff?

You’re a change agent. A way shower.

This month is an opportunity to root out the times you’ve taken the weirdness on as a wrongness of you. Journal about it. I suggest doing the dead wood ritual (click here) to let it go. To transform and transmute the energy. Take back your power.

If what you offer your clients,
if the tools you use are unconventional
and done in love.
There’s no wrongness in that.

Be you.
Go be seen, by choice.
Not by chance.

There are those waking up- aka coming of age- that need to hear this from me, from you. They may be crossing into territory deemed wrong, bad, the devil’s work.

Waking up is hard because you have to surrender the generational trauma-beliefs that are deeply ingrained… in thought, in the cells, in the breath and body of you.

AQUARIUS.

When the sun moves through this sign it highlights this weirdness among the muggles. This is the sign where you get to break out of the collective shell. Create in a new way. Innovate.

It’s also a place fraught with judgement.

“It’s the way we’ve always done it….”
“don’t go that way.”
“stay the same.”
“it’s dangerous to think that way.”

You my friend are an explorer of new frontiers.
Boldly going where your intuition asks you to.
A full body knowing…. honoring that life pulse within you.

If you are a recovering Christian, here are a few people I follow on Instagram:

The New Evangelicals: https://www.instagram.com/thenewevangelicals/

Bad.Pastor® https://www.instagram.com/p/CoYElEQO4mU/

If you need to talk…please reach out.

With love,

Rev. Michele Grace Lessirard, C.Ht.*

*I am an interfaith minister ordained in 1997 through the Universal Brotherhood Movement, Inc.

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I’m calling this Compassionate Pricing.

Listen pricing is not a one-trick pony. It can be whatever you dang well want it to be. But if you’re following someone else’s pricing model and your body isn’t buying into it then it’s probably feeling wonky. Bottom line you’re not getting the traction you want.

You invest in your business and hire a coach with a dream and a promise to yourself. You commit. It’s an experiment. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. Stop beating yourself up over it. What if you choose differently?

When you leave that coaching program, it’s more than an investment. You may lose friends. You may feel cast aside. You may feel out of sorts. It’s soul loss.

I’ve witnessed too many women lose their ability to make their way in the world.

Fraud, failure and shame = you fucked up big time. (no you didn’t, and that’s why I do what I do). There may be silence too because you remember the voice of the coach saying you’re a quitter, you didn’t do things the right way.

The phrase “high-end client” creates a chasm tinged with judgment, bias and privilege; creating separation between the haves and have nots. The SOMEBODIES and nobodies. In December of 2022 I started asking what else is possible and thus a sliding scale aka compassionate pricing model came through.

If you are charging more great!
If you want to charge more and need support, book a session.
If this is triggering for you then my invitation is to go journal about it.
Pricing can be whatever you dang well want it to be…

Okay. Now that I’ve got that out of the way.

If you’d like to see my pricing structure click here.
If you’d like to talk, schedule a discovery session.

The post Pricing your services…. first appeared on Michele Grace Design & Marketing.

Jupiter calls us to expand into something- a creative process- there’s the ask and the choice. Where you are born with Jupiter you are the attractor. It’s a magnifying force, your personal Midas touch. At the moment of my birth Jupiter in Leo was meeting up with Pluto in Leo (death/rebirth) in the 10th house at 27°- late degrees in a sign are considered fated.

Issues around death, dying and beyond would be a catalyst of my greater work in the world.

When I was 12 years old my grandmother was killed by a drunk driver. Her death shocked me… the first in a series of cascading events that occurred that Spring (Aries Equinox).

My beautiful grandmother was considered “only” a step grandmother by the adults around me; as she was my grandfather’s third wife. Together they built a custom home from House Beautiful floor plans, it was not only stunning but also warm and inviting. Mary Ellen’s passion was collecting antiques and restoring them in her basement. Her presence lent stability to my undiagnosed bipolar grandfather. When mom and I visited, she talked to me as a friend while serving me “big girl” coffee. Once we moved closer, I would often stop by to chat.

Decades after her death I walked into Kmart, when a stunning jet-black haired woman abruptly cut in front of me. The whole experience felt like an apparition, angelic. A tap on the shoulder “Michele it’s time to wake up to the truth of the medicine you carry.”

The woman in Kmart carried the same vibe as my grandmother; seeing her or the reflection of her brought up many buried feelings I had around her death. The sadness and grief. The joy of our connection. But more to the point the contradiction of my parents and grandfather; how they acted one way in private and another way in public. Keeping the family secrets secret.

Soul loss and how it may show up…

It is said you are as sick as the secrets you carry. As children we carry those secrets as a kindness to our parents, and an unkindness to us. This soul loss shows up in the body, mind and spirit. There are crossroads where you get to make a choice– soldier on like generations have done before you in love or with love start to release the gunk that binds us to the lies.

Jupiter is that alchemical solvent that dissolves long standing gunk between you and the ancestors. He changes signs every year, and within that year there is an ask-“Here’s what happened then, now what you are going to do with the awareness?”

For me the Jupiter cycle, the experience as a deathwalker is one experience of many that led me to the shamanic path. My near-death experience at age three gave me insights into energies I wasn’t ready for or didn’t have the words to describe. That talent, gift and capacity went into hiding. My grandmother’s death was a breadcrumb I left along the way to say, “pay attention to what was happening then, and the choices made for you.” What needs to be surrendered?

Even as an interior designer I was designing Hospice and long-term care facilities. Then as a shamanic practitioner my helping allies were very clear on what courses I needed to study-Death, dying and beyond along with training in Compassionate Heart-centered Depossession and Curse breaking.

Jupiter rules the 2nd Chakra in the body. “In alchemy Jupiter/Tin embodies qualities of wisdom, logic, education, and maturity.” The seat of procreation and creativity.

For my friends, clients and students tracking Jupiter’s movement is a gift. There is a story waiting to be revealed and healed.

Your voice, the power of your presence has the potential to change lives. What is the ask of Jupiter? Start there. May you Doodle your way into grace, ease and joy.

With love,

Click here to access my guide Doodle your Passion. How can I out create myself using the Jupiter as a guide?

I started using astrology in my life to heal and empower; the cycles helped me understand where I lost power in living life and then course correct. You don’t have to know astrology or even your chart details, allow what is shared to unfold. Listen to the audio, play with in the doodles. Asking…what is Jupiter’s message in my life and business?

The post My Angelic Meetup in Kmart first appeared on Michele Grace Design & Marketing.

We go to have lunch.
Arriving tired and hungry.
My friend sees a cohort she knows.
We sit down to have lunch together.
Doing the “introductions.”
I babble a bit.
Not expecting to be “ON.”

I take the woman’s business card.
Later that evening back in the hotel room….
Opening up my computer.
I check out the cohort’s website.

There’s a freshly written blog post
a scathing takedown
of my self introduction.
I’m her teachable moment.
Heat rises up my neck,
the criticism stings.

Suddenly I feel very small.
She’s right, my intro sucked.

Takedown.
Taking down a leader.
Taking down a friend.
Taking down a person.
Taking down a movement.

Making them small to make you feel bigger.
I grew up with a mother,
who said one thing in public and
then another thing to me in private.
I don’t do well with two-faced people.

Woo people, scanners, truth tellers
aka renaissance women may feel challenged
when It comes to self-introductions.

The bigness of our message…
What you offer often feels like
trying to sip water out of a fire hose.
I get it. I get you.

We are in the Leo season.
Of creativity. Risk.

What shows up first off this Leo New Moon maybe a wall of shame.
Barriers. False flags. Rudeness. Ego.
Who am I to speak this truth?
Who am I to be so bold?
What way are you taking yourself out of the game of life?

How does my BIGNESS leave me feeling vulnerable?
That is what is known as your BRIGHT shadow.
Spirit calling you to honoring the gifts, talents and capacities you were born with.
Rather than being dedicated to your inadequacies.
This week activate your Bright Shadow.
To your glory, grace and story.

If I carry all this light,
share my story I’ll be ____________ [you can fill in the blank].
First thought? Pull that awareness like unraveling a ball of string.
Who is at the end of the string?
A person. An Event. A decision your little one made.
To go invisible. To stay safe.
Play with that awareness for a day or two.
What pops up?

Your peeps, your community
needs the POWER of your PRESENCE.
Go be you.
All of you.

With joy,

The post To your Glory, Grace and Story first appeared on Michele Grace Design & Marketing.

I went on strike. For 24 hours.
My twitter feed is full of people who have lost a friend, or family member to covid19.
Cried when I saw a doctor or nurse.
Cried when I saw a kindness.
Love. Love. Love.
Community. Connection. Consideration.

Then I see the people out and about,
breaking stay at home orders….
Especially on Florida beaches
without face covering. No social distancing.
That’s their right.
There is no consideration for the sacred other.
It’s all about their rights.
Me and mine.

Think about it.
Most of the residents of Florida hail from another place.
Disconnected from community. Family.
They move here seeking refuge from the cold.
Or the place to retire.
Or escape from their addictions.
They come here full of dreams.

With no connection to the land…
they want what they want.
build this. tear down that.
There’s money to be made.
Me and mine.

The Sun is moving through the sign Taurus now.
There is a lot happening astrologically.
Pluto in Capricorn. Uranus in Taurus.
Energetics I wouldn’t fuck with.
The “me and mine” energy is about to go bust.

© michele grace lessirard

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I laughed at inappropriate times and…

When that wall of pain finally broke loose
I cried a river of tears to heal.

Until one day it stopped.
In the middle of a healing session.
I started laughing.
Laughing hard…
because all my trauma/drama
seemed like the biggest cosmic joke.

In that moment when I started to make myself wrong for laughing.

My teacher said, “laughter is just as powerful as tears. So laugh.”
Shame shifted.
My comedian returned.

Now I laugh at appropriate times.

We need laughter as well as tears.
What if the comedian in the room,
holds the greatest power of transformation?

Think of the Fool card in the Tarot deck.

“The principle of courage; state of no fear; ecstasy and peak experience…The Fool is an excellent symbol to use as an affirmation to enhance courage, risk-taking and creative expression that is needed to give birth to new parts of one’s life.”- Angeles Arrien

I give thanks to the comedians and the satirists,
the modern day fools that are pointing out hard truths,
making me laugh and think outside the box.
We need more Fools.

Be. More. Fool.

With love,

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What’s wrong with 60? 70? 80? I don’t ever want to be 40 again. In January I stopped coloring my hair. Let it go grey. My husband was aghast, “No don’t do it.”

If I keep trying to look younger, I won’t accept the truth of where I stand today. Acceptance. Going grey the ground shifted and things aligned. My ancestors showed up and said, “She’s ready.”

I loved spending time with my grandmother. Going grey helped me re-member again the Elders hold wisdom.

One summer Grandma rented a house at the shore, inviting her sisters and mother to join her. She invited me to fly back from Florida to New Jersey. Imagine a 16 year old spending time with her granny, great aunts and great grandma. Women born in turn of the century, now in their 70’s, along with my 98 year old Great Grandma Bateman, still going strong in the last year of her life. Big sigh. Everything in my life slowed way down that week. These women didn’t rush about, they sat and talked. Shared stories. Laughed.

When my period showed up, I had to run out for supplies, they shared stories of getting their periods. Of my Aunt Dot running through he house hysterical because no one told her about the “women’s stuff.”

“Let’s go for a ride” meant the ritual began. Potty. Sweaters. Pocketbooks. Canes. Walker.

Moving like turtles 45 minutes later we were in the car driving all over South Jersey. Visiting places we all grew up. Ocean City. Cedarville. Fortescue. Delaware Bay. Stopping at farm stands. Remembering when so and so did this. Oh remember when they tore that down.

I can’t remember those stories now, but the energy is with me. I wish I’d asked more. Listened deeper. That week they loved me at a time I felt isolated and alone. Now I see they too felt isolated and alone.

As an Interior Designer in my 30’s I designed retirement living facilities. I saw a lot of healthy vital people in their 80’s having a good time. My colleague, an architect, who spent years designing retirement facilities shared,

I didn’t know what he meant… until I hit 50. Moving through 50’s is not easy, there are a lot of endings and beginnings. Like a steel blade in the fire you’re tempered. If I’m fighting where I’m at it feels like slogging through life. Choices are being made. My first astrology teacher was 14 years older than me and shared through the lens of her life experience as a mother and grandmother.

I’m proud of the “seasoned” wisdom I bring into client sessions. That’s my role as an elder.  By the time you’ve reach 60 it feels like you’ve been stripped bare and back to 40. What it does mean is you own where you’re at…warts, shame and all.

It means you grieve deep losses, the should of’s and could of’s.

It means you own the age you’re at, and wear it proudly.

It means your life’s journey is real.

There’s a deep rich story to tell that younger ones need to hear.

Who are you choosing to be your mentor and why? Have they had the life experiences to nurture what you want to bring forward? Own your wisdom. Own your life’s journey. Be the elder you’re meant to be.

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I’m an empath* by nature and nurture.

As a baby I quickly learned how to pick up on other people’s feelings to keep me safe. Empathy is my radar of choice. Today I’m here to share the story of what happened growing up. I called Dad and invited him to the session. He refused “I can’t be there for you!” Good to know.

I drive 90 miles to my Mom’s therapist of choice. Knots in my stomach, hands shaking I begin reading the ten pages I’ve carefully typed out after Mom asked to hear my story. She’s determined to negate and say it didn’t happen.

The initiations of sexual abuse at three- of having a pillow held over my face brings a dear death experience where my soul flies off as I crossed over to sit with Jesus and Aunt Grace until it was over. Feeling my pain and the panic of my abuser. Stuffing the abuse down then to be loved collaborating with Mom’s  postpartum depression rage creates a wild child that threw fits. I simply would not behave. Angry child. Brat.

Truth showing up and pouring out of me as my little daughter grows up. I’ve connected my dots. Angry child. Brat.

Getting my mouth washed out with soap, feeling the rub of ivory across my teeth. The after burn of picking out soap bits mingled with tears for truth telling- a lot to bear at age three.

Good little girls don’t get angry. Anger means getting spanked, shamed and rejected. I’ll be nice.

What 3-year old pulls down on the refrigerator handle, opens the door, again and again. Turning orange from her first binge on carrots at age three. Me. Trying to fill up the big black hole that follows me around.

Mom thinks her orange kid is a funny story to tell. No one cares to connect the dots. Now the Family says I am crazy; I’m making it all up. I’m shunned by my Beloveds- sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles. Nothing happened. It’s the therapists fault. My SOUL mission: protect my dear sweet baby girl. Being a good mama means not passing on this legacy of shame.

Battling through the crap… my abusers hypnotic mantra “Good girls don’t tell. Good girls don’t tell.”

Telling will kill your mother. Breaking through the wall of silence is the hardest thing.

Good girls do tell. Mom you died to me a long time ago. Looking up over my journal I can feel Mom energetically collapsing. Deena, her therapist asks, “Barbara do you hear what Michele is saying?”

Mom looks far off. Lost, not hearing, not seeing and not feeling. She created a bubble; where nothing touches her and nothing happened. Even with the weight of my words Mom’s strong will and determination keeps her safe.

It’s over. Done.

Why talk about it.

Never happened. No way to go back to right the wrongs; the unspeakable things that were done.

There is only one way and that’s through…

The Snow Queen, who is my real mother shows up, snaps back into place, then looks at Deena “I don’t want her to tell ANYONE that story.”

Can Deena see the steely cold hardness my mother reserves just for me? I know what I know. Strength pours into me, my shaking stops, my soft whisper voice moves to a strong clear bell sound  “You want me to talk in a whisper, to keep quiet and I won’t keep quiet anymore!”

Bam! we’re through. Mom walks out leaving Deena and I behind.

Wait come back, let’s heal. Not going to happen.
Afterwards the Snow Queen calls my sisters telling them “I failed therapy.”

Stunned I sit there in the awkwardness of it all. Thank you Deena.

I write the check. Turning to leave, hand on the doorknob Deena, a co-conspirator, looks me straight in the eye,

“Whatever you’ve done to heal Michele keep doing it!”

Mom and I never talk about this again. Ever.

Don’t tell.

Keep the secrets to yourself.

Don’t share.

What will people think?

Nothing happened.

You’re crazy.

As a healer….all this crap, all the secrets you hold back because someone told you not to tell kills your spirit

and your business. It stops your creative flow, serving the people you are meant to heal. Stops you from making good money. Money. Power. Sex. To be a healed healer, we must share our stories of transformation. Finding our way out of the dark, into the light.

Keeping quiet serves no one. Dancers of the Dark…

What wrongs are you still carrying around in your body, mind and spirit that aren’t even yours?

WayShower. Transformer. Artist. Healer. Rev. Michele Grace Lessirard, an intuitive life coach, helps you break through resistance, stop spinning in doubt so you can come back into balance, make more money and have a greater impact in the community you serve. A certified Money Breakthrough Method® coach, spiritual healer and counselor Michele Grace helps you move your dream from “woo-woo to “who’s who®” in 90 days with heart-centered business building tools.

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